Lolita began as a girl’s nickname, then became famous as the title of Vladimir Nabokov’s 1955 novel. In that book a middle-aged man tells, in beautiful English, how he wants a child who is far too young. The story is told from the man’s twisted point of view, which is part of why the book is both famous and uncomfortable. After the novel, English started using “a Lolita” for a girl who is still a child in the law’s eyes, but whom some adults describe as looking or acting “sexy.” That is the dictionary sense — and it is a harmful one. The word often puts the spotlight on the girl, as if she were the problem. A child cannot consent; the wrong is always the adult’s. Using Lolita about a real young person is insulting, and it can make a crime sound like a story. In careful talk you meet it when people discuss the book, or how culture sexualises girls. As slang it is creepy, not cute. Japanese and Taiwanese pop talk also has 蘿莉, from this name, with its own fashion and anime life — sometimes about a childlike look, not always sexual. That use and the English noun are cousins, not twins. Do not mix them up, and do not soften the English word.